In the stinking gutters of British politics, Prime Minister Fishi Sunak has embarked on a mission to prove that even the most unwanted pests can find a cosy home in the heart of government. In a move that left many scratching their heads (and some itching their skin), Fishi has demonstrated an unexpected flair for entomology, welcoming Cameron the Cockroach back into the political fold with open antennae, presumably to tap into the former leader’s unparalleled expertise in dodging accountability and surviving political disasters. It seems the phrase “you can’t kill a cockroach” now applies not only to nuclear fallout but also to political fallout.

As Lord Dave scuttles back into the limelight, you can’t help but marvel at the sheer audacity of it all. Often called the Teflon-coated Blattodea of British politics, he has proven that no scandal or mishap can keep him away from the intoxicating allure of power. It’s as if he never left: the EU Referendum, austerity, the Greensill scandal, and the infamous pig’s head incident were mere blips on his political career. Are we supposed to feel grateful for the opportunity to witness the second coming of a creature known for its uncanny ability to survive anything and everything, including its own questionable decisions?

But the appointment of Cameron could be seen as a nod to recycling, something that environmentalists might appreciate if only it weren’t applied to politicians. After all, why let a good prime ministerial career go to waste when you can reuse, reduce, and redeploy a Tory relic who has already proven his ability to weather scandals?

As we watch this farce unfold, we can’t help but wonder if it is a masterstroke of leadership or a laughable attempt at reviving a bygone era. In any case, we can rest assured that Dave is back and ready to cruise through another nuclear political winter. After all, who better to guide us through turbulent times than the insect who ineptly navigated the murky waters of the Brexit referendum and promptly abandoned ship?